If I need to express anger, what’s the best way to do it?

Anger is a natural emotion. Sometimes, it can even be a healthy one. Controlling your temper, though, without being pushy, aggressive, or violent, is crucial.

Be Assertive, Not Angry

Assertiveness is one of the healthiest ways to deal with anger. Learn to be assertive by knowing what your needs are and how to meet them and then calmly make them clear. 

Use Non-Violent Communication

Respect others by using nonviolent communication (NVC). NVC can help slow your thoughts down, helping you to remain calm. For example, present neutral facts about the situation instead of making acquisitions--"You missed dinner" as opposed to "You are late." 

Avoid Hurting Others

When you're tired, upset, or frustrated, it's easy to lash out. You should never hurt another person with your words or through violent acts. 

Knowing the physical and emotional signs of anger can help you regain control. You might notice your jaw clenching or your heart racing, for instance. Recognize these signs, so you can stop yourself before anger takes over.

Use "I" Statements

You can also avoid hurting people with your words is by using "I" statements. These types of statements allow you to talk about your feelings without making others feel like you're judging or blaming them. 

Manage Your Anger With The Right Tools.

When you start to feel angry, stop, take a deep breath, and use the right tools to get your point across. For example, people are more likely to pay attention when you make good eye contact, stand tall with uncrossed arms, and keep your voice down.